in and out of focus

I’ve had a truly interesting week, but it hasn’t been a photogenic one, and it’s not really amenable even to description. I’m still in the mulling it over phase. But, knowing that my devoted fan base will lose heart without a regular update, I’ll muddle through.

Over the weekend, when we were in New Jersey, I noticed that I kept removing my glasses, and then putting them back on, unable to get comfortable. At one point – this was at night, riding shotgun in the car – I removed my glasses and covered my left eye. And I was astounded at how blurry the road signs were. See, my right eye is far-sighted, and my left eye is near-sighted. As a kid and even all the way through my twenties, I could easily completely tune out either eye with my brain, and just focus the eye that made sense given the situation. The chalkboard at the front of the classroom: left eye. The road sign a few hundred yards away: right eye.

I’ve also got astigmatism. That’s when – due to an irregularity in the curvature of my lenses – I apparently have trouble focusing on fine details. Oh, and straight lines, like the top edge of a wall as it hits the ceiling, can seem a bit curvy to me.

So I’ve known all this. I figured, I’m getting to that age where I hold books a bit farther away than I used to – my brother-in-law just got progressives – maybe it’s just time for new glasses, maybe I need progressives, who knows. So once we got home, on Monday, I called my eye guy and on Tuesday morning (yay, power of positive intent!) they fit me in.

Oooooh, turns out I have an even COOLER problem! My eyes have a tendency to diverge – when at rest – from one another. In order to keep them focused on the same thing, I have to bring them together. Actually, this is normal, we all do it – just imagine bringing your hands right in front of your face: you will have to cross your eyes a bit. In my case, though, my eyes have to move not only horizontally in towards each other a bit more than “normal”, they also have to move in the vertical plane. Trippy! So yeah, I definitely need a new prescription, that uses the magic of prisms to move the image a bit over-and-down (or maybe it’s over-and-up; I’m not sure) so that rather than me using my brain and eye muscles quite so much, the glasses will do the work.

(Incidentally, I like this optometrist and his staff so much that that basically, I just told the glasses lady, “pick out some frames for me” and, as usual, she completely nailed it. I’ll be sure to post pictures of the new pair when it comes in. They’re PURPLE.)

(But I digress.)

After seeing my eye guy, I ran errands and such. And as soon as I got to the Safety and Sanctuary of Home, I kinda collapsed. It was like I finally got that this has not been my imagination: my eyelid’s been twitching for a few weeks now, and my whole face has been hurting, and I’d just kinda ignored it until – OK, picture me getting all melodramatic – I Could Take It No More. Fetchez le ibuprofen!

On Tuesday, I almost-completely-finished painting the bathroom and did other virtuous home-based things, all while listening to podcasts from “Speaking of Faith” and some Reiki people out of Australia. That night, we had dinner with friends. A lovely time. They asked me all about this sabbatical thingy I’m doing, and I tried to explain it, and one of them summed it up for me beautifully. He said it sounds like I’m a frequency-holder for the Aquarian age. Whooooooaaaahhhhh. That sounded Exactly Right, even though I’d be hard pressed to explain to you what it actually means. And then later, he sent me an excerpt from Eckhart Tolle’s “New Earth” – a book I actually have and have partially read – that explains the whole frequency-holder thing.

Ooooohhhh….that’s like immersing my soul in a hot tub. Yes, please!

See, if I were a good blogger, I’d now explain what a frequency-holder is. I’m a gonna make you google it, instead. What I was saying that prompted Gurudharm (our friend; he’s Sikh) to make that comment was something along these lines:

What seems to make sense for me right now as a General Life Strategy, is to not worry so much about changing the planet, one Fortune 500 company at a time (my 20’s and early 30’s), or community-development /civic engagement involvement stuff (my most recent paid employment). What makes sense these days to me is, being sane, reverent, paying attention, and not worrying so much about the Trying, the Accomplishment, the Resumé Food stuff. What matters to me these days is the quality of my vibe. I know that sounds all woo woo – bring on the flowing purple caftans – but honestly? That’s what I’ve got going on now. I think I can do more good in the world living from this place, than I can with all the effort-ing I used to engage in.

(The downside of this General Life Strategy is the occasional fear that I have Dumpster diving in my future. But let’s not go there.)

On Wednesday, I was pretty sure there was some kind of metaphysical link between my cool and freaky eyes, and this whole sabbatical, but I couldn’t bring it into focus, pun either fully or not-at-all intended. What did I do Wednesday? Who knows. That was ages ago. Oh, I had chorus at night and THAT was a blast.

And that brings us to today: my first official day volunteering as a Reiki practitioner at the hospital. That was way cool. Imagine! I get to put my hands on people and Just Be! 

And then I did some Santa related errands, which I can’t tell you about.

OK, that’s all for now. Here’s some kitty porn.

They’re each at 12 pounds. That means that collectively, they’ve lost more than either of them now weighs.