Tuesday, November 22, 2011

one of my patented recipes.

I habe a code. I’m one of those people who at the slightest sign of a cold, I make it go away through sheer force of will. “Nope, sorry, not going to happen,” I say. But I missed the bus on this one – Kevin’s been out of commission with what turns out to be bronchitis, and over the weekend, as I decompressed from a couple of intense weeks, I let down my guard and the little %^&*@# virus got past the gate.

Normally, I’d stay home from work and not inflict myself on the general populace, but a girl’s got to earn a paycheck somehow, particularly after six days of jury duty, so I headed in. Since I work at a yogurt factory – not in production, I do officey stuff – there is an emphasis on hygiene and hand sanitizer everywhere. I think I was coated in hand sanitizer by the time I got home. Mmmmm….hand sanitizer. I hate that stuff, but it seemed like the polite thing to do.

Why am I telling you this. Apparently because I don’t have anything else to say. No new photos. No home renovation projects – at this time last year, we were renovating the downstairs bathroom. (In desperation, I was going to do a “one year ago today” post. I made my first ever apple pie with a crust from scratch on this day last year, woo hoo.)

Sheesh, it’s bedtime already.

Happy thanksgiving, loved ones. Oh, inspiration strikes! here we go, I’ll share my favorite Thanksgiving dish recipe! A true classic, in that we only ever ate this on Thanksgiving and Christmas, and nobody else I’ve ever met has ever heard of this. I might have changed the name of the dish. Sorry, Mom!

A Holiday Favorite: Eyeballs in Cheese Sauce

Step 1. if you are my grandmother who originated this recipe, don’t read this. Oh right: you aren’t likely to read this. See, Grandma apparently peeled the tiny onions by hand. Screw that!

Step 2: Go get yourself a bag of Bird’s Eye pearl onions. Cook them following the instructions on the bag, which generally involves boiling them in some water for like, I dunno, ten minutes or so. The goal here is to have them all thawed out and not clumped together in an unattractive lumpy pile of ugliness. You’re looking forward to this, aren’t you?

Step 3: Make a white sauce with about 3 T butter, 3 T flour, and a cup or so of hot milk. You’ve never made a white sauce before? Oh, this is easy. You melt the butter. You get the milk hot (nuke it, whatever, just get it hot). Sprinkle the flour in the butter and whisk it for a bit. Let it cook. Don’t let it get brown – that’s something else entirely.

Add the milk slowly, whisking every so often, until it starts to thicken.

Step 4: Now add a bunch of grated cheddar cheese. Say…a cup and a half. Let it get all nice and melted and well incorporated.  Add the secret ingredients: a bit of dry mustard powder, and a splash of Worcestershire sauce. (Ingredients I have no other use for than this dish.) If you’re feeling super fancy, put in a dash of white pepper.

Step 5: Combine said sauce with drained, cooked onions in a baking dish. Sprinkle the obligatory paprika over the top. Bake it for, um, say a half hour to 45 minutes at 350. I don’t think you need to cover it.

That’s it! Enjoy!

P.S. For other tried and true recipes, you might want to check out my recipe for butternut/squash soup – also known as “how to dirty every pot and surface in your kitchen”. Or my recipe for chocolate brain damage sauce, which generates a lot of blog traffic, I think because people think I’m actually going to tell them how to prepare heroin. Honestly, people.

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